STRENGTH

Do you ever wonder (or worry) if you’re a strong person, like how you’ll handle stressful or traumatic events? Will you surrender to risky choices or pressure? Might you just give up & stop trying or believing? Or will you shut down or wall off any emotion at all, not letting anyone help you or understand how you feel? Is your reality the truth of any event, honestly real, or just your agitated imagination? Where & how do you find the courage, determination, & wisdom to trudge thru your difficult times to break out on the other side of turmoil?

“Being strong doesn’t mean hiding your pain. It doesn’t mean forgoing help when you’re struggling. It doesn’t mean refusing to show sadness and vulnerability. And it doesn’t mean carrying the burdens of life all by yourself. Anything that prevents your healing and stifles your growth does not correspond with strength. Being strong means refusing to tolerate people and things that wound your soul. It means practicing self-care when you’re hurting. It means honoring your feelings by actually allowing yourself to feel and express them. It means treating yourself with compassion and kindness, even when you feel like you don’t deserve any. It means doing what makes you happy and being with people who make you feel good. It means asking for help when the weight of the world has become too much. It means giving yourself permission to get your needs met by setting boundaries. It means to take care of yourself.

“Breathe. All of the times you felt this anxious and this overwhelmed. All of the times you felt this level of pain. And remind yourself how each time, you made it through. Life has thrown so much at you, and despite how difficult things have been, you’ve survived. Breathe and trust that you can survive this too. Trust that this struggle is part of the process. And trust that as long as you don’t give up and keep pushing forward, no matter how hopeless things seem, you will make it.

”If you’re struggling, you deserve to make self-care a priority. Whether that means lying in bed all day, eating comfort food, crying, sleeping, rescheduling plans, finding an escape through a good book, watching your favorite TV show, or doing nothing at all — give yourself permission to put your healing first. Quiet the voice telling you to do more and be more, and today, whatever you do, let it be enough. Feel your feelings, breathe, and be gentle with yourself. Acknowledge that you’re doing the best you can to cope and survive. And trust that during this time of struggle, it’s enough.”  ~~ Daniell Koepke

Finding strength, down deep inside, is not about brute willpower, lack of emotion, denial, or pretending. It’s more about simply having hope & faith that your pain will heal & the pendulum will swing back. It’s believing that nothing really happens by accident, & just because you don’t currently have a goal, purpose, or destination, even a direction to turn, the answers & options will appear when you’re ready to see & take advantage of the opportunity. You can never fully live, love, & appreciate today until you can let go of yesterday’s pain, not the lesson but the sorrow & regret. And stop wallowing in your pain. No one else’s sympathy for you is going to take away the pain. There’s a reason for everything that happens in your life. Be patient when you feel like you’ve lost everything, & humble when you feel like you have everything. Cry when the tears build up so they can cleanse your wounds & heal, then continue your journey. A loss, that HOLE in your life, simply means there’s room for something or someone else to move in & bring joy into your life again. Smile & remember the good times with gratitude for the happiness & love. Smile & remember the sadness, mistakes & bad times with gratitude for the lessons life has taught you.

“I used to think the worst thing in life is to end up all alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel all alone.” ― Robin Williams

“Instead of looking at what's depressing, look at what's a blessing.” ~~ Kristen Butler 

“Inner peace begins the moment you choose not to allow another person or event to control your emotions.” ~~ Pema Chodron

Life is always changing, sometimes for the good & sometimes for the bad. But you always have at least two choices: do something, or don’t do anything.  Usually nothing changes if you don’t make the choice to make a change. 

“It is best not to know too much too soon. It is best to know only that the story continues and to follow where it takes you." ~~ Mark David Gerson

The pain from your past builds your strength, like muscles that get exercised. Never believe your mind if it says to give up because eventually you’ll be looking forward instead of backwards at your past.

“To get over the past, you first have to accept that the past is over. No matter how many times you revisit it, analyze it, regret it, or sweat it…it’s over. It can hurt you no more.” ~~ Mandy Hal

“We are all a little broken. But last time I checked, broken crayons still color the same.” ~~ Trent Shelton

“You must make a decision that you are going to move on. It wont happen automatically. You will have to rise up and say, ‘I don’t care how hard this is, I don’t care how disappointed I am, I’m not going to let this get the best of me. I’m moving on with my life.’ You must make up your mind that no matter what comes your way, no matter how difficult, no matter how unfair, you will do more than simply survive. You will thrive in spite of it.”  ~~ Joel Osteen

“I think it's very healthy to spend time alone. You need to know how to be alone and not be defined by another person.” ~~ Olivia Wild

“Be strong, but not rude. Be kind, but not weak. Be bold, but don’t bully. Be humble, but not shy. Be proud, but not arrogant.” ~~Jim Rohn

“We are not our yesterdays and are given the gift of today to change our tomorrows.” ~~ Kim Malchuk

“You know you have made the right decision when there is peace in your heart.” ~~ Sabina Tabakovi

“I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes. Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You’re doing things you’ve never done before, and more importantly, you’re doing something. So that’s my wish for you, and all of us, and my wish for myself. Make new mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes. Make mistakes nobody’s ever made before. Don’t freeze, don’t stop, don’t worry that it isn’t good enough, or it isn’t perfect, whatever it is: art, or love, or work or family or life. Whatever it is you’re scared of doing, do it. Make your mistakes, next year and forever.” ~~ Neil Gaiman

“I’ve been through so much that there isn’t much left that can scare me. I’ve felt the most pain that I could feel, and I’ve felt the most pressure that I could feel and there’s nothing else left. And I believe that I’m capable of doing anything.” ~~Ronda Rouse

“Someday you will be faced with the reality of loss. And as life goes on, days rolling into nights, it will become clear that you never really stop missing someone special who’s gone, you just learn to live around the gaping hole of their absence. When you lose someone you can’t imagine living without, your heart breaks wide open, and the bad news is you never completely get over the loss. You will never forget them. However, in a backward way, this is also the good news. They will live on in the warmth of your broken heart that doesn’t fully heal back up, and you will continue to grow and experience life, even with your wound. It’s like breaking an ankle that never heals perfectly, and that still hurts when you dance, but you dance anyway with a slight limp, and this limp just adds to the depth of your performance and the authenticity of your character. The people you lose remain a part of you. Remember them and always cherish the good moments spent with them.

“I don’t think pain goes away. I think we make room for it. With time, love, forgiveness and healing, it eventually takes up less room. Not until then, are we able to fill up that space with a sense of peace and joy in our heart and soul.

“Move on. Stop wishing about “if only” things could have been different. It’s just a chapter in the past. But don’t close the book. Just turn the page for every day is a chance to make new beginnings, new hopes and new endings.”  ~~ Brigitte Nicole

“Breathe. All of the times you felt this anxious and this overwhelmed. All of the times you felt this level of pain. And remind yourself how each time, you made it through. Life has thrown so much at you, and despite how difficult things have been, you’ve survived. Breathe and trust that you can survive this too. Trust that this struggle is part of the process. And trust that as long as you don’t give up and keep pushing forward, no matter how hopeless things seem, you will make it.” ~~ Daniell Keopke

“I have learned to be grateful even when I feel sad, to think positively when I’m surrounded by negativity, to hold fast to faith even when I feel hopeless, to accept love even when I feel unlovable; because despite all the noise in my head that tell me my life is over, the sun shows up every morning and shines, reminding me that I can surely do the same.” ~~Margaret. M. Painter

CHANGE. That’s what life is all about. Roll with the punches to the gut & keep moving. Everything that’s good or bad will eventually change whether you think you have the strength to survive or not. Gratitude & thankfulness for the joy & the lessons. Maybe strength is really nothing more than simply not to resisting the inevitable changes.